1) You’ve slept with a lot of guys haven’t you?
Warning: Do not take this as ‘you performed brilliantly in the sack’…it means the gentleman thought you were as loose as an old drawstring Nike bag. Good comeback is “No you’re just small”
2) You’ve got to go, my wife will be back any minute
Wait wife? Caution: Be quick and check your chin for any tissue stuck on by c*m
3) What would you say if I said I killed someone?
WHAT THE F. You crazy mo. Action: Improv
4) I think it would be a good idea for you to get a STI check up soon, very soon..
Do: Slap him
5) I lost the condom somewhere..inside you
Remember: ‘Tiny dick’